Corn Commentary

Must See Meat TV

In case you missed it, Tuesday night’s Colbert Nation is must see TV for meat eaters.

American Meat Institute (AMI) President J. Patrick Boyle was the main dish on comedian Stephen Colbert’s “Know Your Lobby” segment, which profiles lobbying organizations.

“Although I’ve had a lot of tough interviews in my day, that was definitely the toughest and most unique interview experience of my career,” Boyle said. “I was honored to play straight man to the hilarious Stephen Colbert and to demonstrate that while meat processing is serious business, we can be good sports.” AMI reports that Boyle’s interview with the comedian was two hours long, edited down to a four minute segment for the show.

Colbert’s intro to the interview features him “pledging allegiance” to a bacon flag: “I pledge allegiance to the meat of the United Steaks of America. And to the ribeye for which it broils, one bacon under God, with liver and onions for all!”

Chomping down on a huge turkey leg, Colbert confounds Boyle with questions like, “At what point will the AMI say ‘stop America, that’s the perfect amount of meat’?” and “Who’s pooping on our meat?” Colbert’s pièce de résistance comes when he asks (hypothetically, of course) if AMI would endorse the eating of people if there were no more animals. “The American Meat Institute would not support a policy of cannibalism,” says Boyle with a straight face. “We would not recommend humans for human consumption.”

Tongue planted firmly in cheek, it is pretty darn funny.

Watch it here on line.

Katy in Meat Candyland

Pop singer Katy Perry may be marrying a vegetarian, but she reportedly wants to sing the praises of meat wearing a bacon bikini on her next CD that she wants to smell like sausage.

Since I am still stuck in the 70s when it comes to music, I somehow missed this little tidbit when it came out in the music trades earlier this month. And I had to do a little research to find out just who this little Pop Tart was exactly, since I had heard her name but was not familiar with her classic tunes, like “I Kissed a Girl” and the more recent “California Gurls” (did she forget how to spell girl after she kissed one?)

While she has made her career so far singing about fruits and sweets and dressing up in food-themed costumes, like cupcake bras, she apparently wants to get a little more meaty next time. I just wonder why the singer appears to have suffered no backlash from groups like PETA since this story came out August 1. Maybe they ignored it because she’s engaged to English comedian Russell Brand, who is a vegetarian, and either that cancels it out or they hope he will convert her. Or maybe PETA is just too busy monkeying around with Dodge to be disturbed!

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